


Growing Pains

by WyvernSpirit



Category: Carmen Sandiego (Cartoon 2019)
Genre: Absent Parents, Angst, Banter, Best Friends, Bullying, Carmen and Player are just really good friends, Carmen is concered, Dont copy to another site, Drabble Collection, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Feels, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, IM BLESSED, Male-Female Friendship, Mom friend Carmen, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Overstimulation, Panic Attack, Player (Carmen Sandiego 2019) has ADHD, Player is concerned, Self projection, They have a moment, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Trust, Understanding, Vulnerability, as friendsss, beated, by 2 people, currently no archive warning apply, even if Carmen is totally the mom friend, interconnected drabbles?, my beta's are gods, player has adhd, shared pain, stan beta's, the dictionary of obscure sorrows in later chapters, the kind where they admit how much they care for each other, they work so hard to make this readable
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-02
Updated: 2019-02-02
Packaged: 2019-10-20 18:06:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17627069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WyvernSpirit/pseuds/WyvernSpirit
Summary: Carmen and Player both sheltered, hurt and how they learn to heal through each other.





	Growing Pains

**Author's Note:**

  * For [justanothercatgirl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/justanothercatgirl/gifts).



> “ “ speaking  
> ‘ ‘ thoughts  
> Italics emphasize  
> Betated by CharCOL from the V.I.L.E discord server and ManChildEvoulution from the Genjutsu Support Group discord server.  
> Also yes this is a multi chapter fic (my first one!) so do please subscribe for more. It’s a interconnected drabble fic really, this story does have a purpose and an ending but you could probably read all of the chapters excluding the final one in any order.
> 
> Also this is a very self project kind of fic. Since we know nothing about Player I kinda dumped my school problems and over sensitivity onto him. Carmen is filling the role of my online mom friend (who I love very much) who helped me with my struggles.

_Astimik_

_n. A moment where everything seems to ,stop but everything is also moving at the same time. Where you feel stuck in place, like a big shining spotlight is over you, freezing you to the ground. Everything is both too much at once and entirely too little. When your heart, mind, lungs and soul are screaming this is wrong, this is bad,_ _**weneedtogo** _ _. Things are shaking your mind, your breaths, your thoughts and emotions, yet you can do nothing but delve further and further into this unending panic that you don't even remember starting. The over stimulation driving deep into your mind uncontrollably and not knowing if you can ever escape from it's grasp._

Player's day had started normally enough. He had woken up, talked to Carmen for a while, then headed to school.

Oh how he hated school. Everything always felt like too much. His senses were constantly overloaded and the people there seemed to hate him. Not only was he a few grades ahead of his age group, but being socially clueless added to his isolation. He had no friends and was considered "that weird genius kid". It was uncomfortable being there and once again he had wished he'd taken his "guardian's" idea of online school.

"Oh you'd do well in online courses that way once you've finished your work you could spend your time doing other things and not just be waiting for school to end!"

He hated how his "Guardian" - he refused to acknowledge her as anything but that - had a point. Normally, even though he was in a higher level that most kids his age, he was still the first one done in class (especially in mathematics, geography, science and technology).

He let out a groan as he hit his mattress, head pounding. "I hate whoever decided this needed to be a class." No he’s not being fair, he actually liked the subject, just not the class and people in it.

When geography rolled around, things started to go south. Many of his classmate simply didn't care for the class, and the teacher was one of the most incompetent in the school. Not teaching wise as she knows her subject well. However, Miss Smith or as the students called her behind her back, “Miss Ginger Dumb-Ass”, could not control a class for her life “,or she just didn’t seem to care”. Naturally, the students took advantage of this and goofed off in her classes. ‘Thank god’ Player thought to himself, ‘at least I only have her for this one class’. The one class of hers alone is a nightmare”:no one pays attention, people throw stuff and shove desks. They  _literally_  talk at the tops of their voices, yelling across the classroom 20 different conversations going on and all at  _once”. It’s too much._

He nearly had a breakdown in the middle of class, heck he's pretty sure he actually did. He was very quiet, so he  _just_ got by. ‘I was pretty close to sobbing though and that I can't keep that quiet so small mercies I guess’ Player thought. His heart was pounding, and things felt like they were spinning.  _It was just too much._ __  
_  
_ He felt caged. Player had wanted to run, to bolt out of the classroom, but he couldn’t. He just got further and further into an unending panic, and when he finally seemed to wake up, his body was shaking, silent tears rolling down his face. He knew the only reason nobody noticed was because he was at the back of the room and while he was battling his _own damn mind_ he hadn’t made a single sound.

Across from him, one of his computers beeps, signalling Carmen was texting him. He blinked as he came out the memory, body and breath shaking. With a small sigh, he dragged himself over before plopping in his chair. Player brushed back his messy locks and fixed his crumpled clothes. He had to get himself together, this was him helping Carmen, this he can do.

Carmen's cheerful face appeared on screen. Player began to regret his recent decision to introduce her to video chat.

He swallowed, hoping he didn't look as bad as he felt and clicked on his own side connecting him to facetime. "Hey Car," he croaked. Crap, even his voice sounded awful.

Carmen, who had been about to start rambling (he knew that look in her eye by now) paused. "You okay Player?" Her voice was soft, concern visible on her features, he so desperately wanted to tell her everything to just have one person to talk to about his problems but he  _couldn’t_. She had just escaped from her shitty life, and inwardly he cursed everyone at her school. Sure she wasn't mad at them but he could be, she didn't need this dumped on her too.

"I'm fine, Carmen." Seeing the unsure look on her face, he continued, "Really, I'm fine just a bad day at school this is more important." He forced a smile.

"No, Player." She said,her gentle voice touched with admonishment. She continued, “This is not more important, your feelings are valid. I can understand not wanting to talk but don't ever feel like your feelings aren't important."   
  


His smile turned to a grimace, and the dam broke. Player let out a shuddering sob and shakily told her everything in one long, rambled mess.   
  


After a minute of silence, Carmen spoke up. “I’m sorry you're having over sensitivity issues, although it sounds like most would. Is it still too much?”   
  
“Kinda” Player replied shakily. “Nobody else in my class seems to really have these problems? Then again, the kids who have sensitivity issues have stopped coming to the class, and if they do they normally bring headphones.” He fiddled nervously with his fingers and resisted the urge to chew on his jacket laces.  
  
“Hey,” Carmen piped up. “Even  _if_ someone somehow decided that whatever it is that's getting to you shouldn't be getting to you as much as it is? Which by the way fuck them, the point remains that no one, including yourself, can tell you how you're supposed to feel.”  
  
Player let out a startled laugh “I've never heard you curse before.” He drummed his fingers anxiously against his desk.   
  
Carmen blushed, the red spread across her cheeks and along her nose. “I felt it was the only way to express myself. Please never say those kinds of words, kid.”  
  
Player snorted “Sure mom.” and let out a weak sigh.

“It's hard, and it sounds obvious, but you have to let yourself feel things, and not try to mitigate it by telling yourself you should feel something else. I do it all the time myself, and it's shitty” 

This time Player paused concerned “You okay Car?”  
  
Carmen let out a weary chuckle “We can discuss my problems later, right now we need to help you feel better. Anything standing out to you in particular?”   
  
Player shook his head slowly “Maybe? My throats dry and my head hurts, things are kinda spinning too.”  
  


Carmen nodded. “Right, right that’s normal I believe.” She started again. “Okay umm, sit down on your bed, lie down if you can and take 6 really deep, slow breaths soft and sure, as slow as you can go without straining yourself. Feel gravity on your body, and where you're pushing into what you're laying on you are here, living in this moment your mind is yours, and you can affect where your focus goes. There are people that care about you,  _I_  care about you.”  
  
Sniffling, Player took to her orders and walked slowly to his bed before letting himself sink down into it. Each breath he took hurt, but slowly they can become more sure and steady. “Okay, that’s a little better.” he whispered.   
  
Carmen spoke softly “Okay, if you sit or move you might feel a little woozy that's normal your adrenaline levels spiked and this lowered them.”   
  
Her words sounded almost like something she had been told before or read about. Player was willing to bet it was the latter, as since running from the island, she had read as many books, blogs and other material she could get her hands on. “Sorry” he mumbled.  
  
“Nope” was her reply “Player, you are not a burden to me. You’ve helped me so much, so let me help you. Sure, you may have issues that require help or support but  _you are not your problems._ You're worth more than that to me.” she was a little hesitant as she spoke.

  
Player felt tears build up behind his eyes as he smiled softly “Thanks Car.”   
  
There was a pause “You're welcome, Player.”  


End file.
